If’n You Don’t Believe Me

A young member of the devil-class once mused…
“What’s with all these holy men we read about in all the old books, eschewing shoe shops in all their bare-naked foot-washing abandon? Probably just a means to root out the hornier ones amongst them; keep their lascivious pokers out in the open, out of their tight little holy places. Nowadays seems it’s a means to maybe save all the sweet young holies for themselves, rather… Save all their bare-naked soles by delivering them from their innocence with lashings of holy excrescence. I mean, just look at the news these days if’n you don’t believe me!”
He then told me how his grandfather had come home once, all undone and in a huff, betrayed by his lack of sartorial guile and human feet. “All it takes boy is just one hoof… just a single hoof in plain sight.”
Such a fate was not for this clever one, though. Being a more modern, forward-thinking sort of devil and hip to all the latest trends & fashions in footwear he thought to conceal all of his churlish character within a small, hoof-like nail on a single toe of his left foot.
Perhaps the moral of all this is to say something about the modern mind — praise it condemn it as you may — everyone so concerned and pre-occupied with the devilish retail wrappings and conditions of one another’s feet.

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